You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
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I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
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Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
My bed smells like the plague