so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
just found the deal breaker
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.