Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
He did a backflip because drugs
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Randomize