I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
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