This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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