Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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