no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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