I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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