Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
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