Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
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