Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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