How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Randomize
