i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
Randomize
