a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
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