I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
This house was built for laser tag.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
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