i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize