so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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