Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
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