Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
There r osticjed everywhere
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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