I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
