He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
If I had your ass I would rule the world
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
