Christians are straight up FREAKS
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize