you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Just rolled over and found your boyfriend in bed with me. Is mine at your house?
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Success! We fucked roommates!
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