Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
