Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
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