it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
Randomize