Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
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