Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
It must be illegal for me to be this drunk in front of this many children
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
