It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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