Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
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