He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
