STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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