Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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