My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
try to milk me bitch
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