Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
two words...techno handjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
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