So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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