Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
