There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
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