yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
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