It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
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Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
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I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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