Umm I'm too high to move.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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