so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Bring more bourbon. Day drunk just hit another level.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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