Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
Why is your signature on my underwear?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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