turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
This house was built for laser tag.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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