glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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