Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize