I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Panties = found
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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