i just had sex bonerless
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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