Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
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it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
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It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens