I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
