I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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