You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
